So, quick story . I was working in the Er one night. Picked up an extra shift because I’m greedy , anyways it was a night I usually don’t work. This lady came in and she overdosed on something Her urine came back positive for several things so take you pick.
She was really sick , she coded within the first hour . We did cpr , epi, the whole thing and we were able to regain her pulse.
She was intubated put on a vent and she did code three more time that night. I had a horrible shift . Anyways by the end of my shift she stabilized ICU had no open beds so she stayed in the ER.
I was off only 2 days, came back and she was extubated , off the vent and awake and alert . She was still in the ER, because ICU still had no beds.
So when I was assigned to her I was actually suprised and happy she was doing so much better.
So when I walked into the room she immediately yelled at me to shave her vagina, she wanted to go home and when I refused to shave her vagina she spit on my face. ,
I washed my face , I was soooooo pissed! I mean PISSED! Anyways , I gave her AMA paperwork, and said she was free to go but then she wanted to know who was in charge, because She wanted to tell them I wouldn’t shave her vagina. I told my charge and my charge wanted to fight her😂😂.
Then she wouldn’t leave because her vagina wasn’t shaved and and she wanted pain meds and had no ride. I have her a sandwich and a taxi voucher and a peace out sign .
So police brings in an escort. She was under arrest and confessed to “hiding “ 20,000 worth of chips in her person. Unable to naturally release the chips she was brought to the ER for pain, abdominal distention due to foreign parts.
So basically she came in with police, we were made aware of the situation. Did an X-ray and found the chips were deep in her colon . I don’t know how they, at the jail, attempting to retrieve the chips. But the doctors had to mechanically remove the chips.
So please wash your hands after touching casino chips. Because that’s not the first time this has happened !!
So one time a groom decided to have his bachelor part in Vegas . He wanted to party and have fun and so did his grooms men.
Sooo long story short, the groom got really drunk . His groomsmen wanted to have fun also. So when the groom get so drunk , they decided to put “nair” on his penis and testicles.
So nair is a lotion that makes her hair fall. It’s very strong and not meant to be kept on for a long period of time.
So he comes in with 3 degree burns. The day he is suppose to get married…had to postpone the wedding after being told we couldn’t “fix” it in a couple of hours. So we gave him some pain medicine, cleaned his wounds. His penis was so red and raw, small spots of open skin was visible. Same as the testis. And even part of the thighs. Sooo painful. We had to dress his penis, testis, thighs.
Burns take so long to heal and are sooo painful to physical treat and change the dressing . I never asked how he explained it to his future wife
So I came in my shift my pt was a 90 year old pt she was sedated and intubated. Diagnosed with AAA, Abdominal aortic aneurysm type A. Basically a bulging or ballon like bubble in the aorta that needs immediate medical attention can result in death by bleeding to death from the inside.
Family wanted time to decide what to do so we extubated the pt and waited for the sedation to wear off to get her opinion. It was taking a long time so family went home for the night around 8pm.
At 4am I walked past her room and to my surprise she was sitting up. Since arriving to work pt has not moved at all so I walked into the room. She was sitting up turned to me and smiled asked me when her daughter was coming back. I said soon I will call her right now. She said thank you then smiled. I turned and left the room picked up the phone called her daughter as soon as I started talking I hear the alarms. I put the phone down run to her room asystole rhythm, no pulse, pt eyes tell me everything. She has passed away. I can’t help but notice her neck is pulsing extending outwards almost like a toad. The aneurysm has burst and she was bleeding to death internally. All within minutes she woke up asked for her daughter then died. She smiled when talking right before she died so I tell myself she died happily thinking her daughter was on her way.
Recently I had a friend move from med surge to the E.R. My friend loves…Loves..LOVES it. I am an Icu nurse, but I do work in E. R at my other job, and I will agree it definitely has it perks. I love her enthusiasm and her spirit its very refreshing, its cute, but then you remember the dark side…the part you dread…the OMG DID THAT JUST HAPPEN part of nursing. The gross side. Here are just a couple off the top of my head
- THE DARK SIDE OF NURSING: THE GROSS EDITION PART ONE
- One time I asked someone for help turning a patient, we turned him and his butt was facing me and he farting this hot butt breath on me then poop started oozing and oozing like hot lava and got all over my gloves and unfortunately my naked wrists… I wanted to die.
- One time I was going to give some meds to a patient that came from a long term care facility , so you already know he was covered in cooties. So he had a peg ( a feeding tube that is connected to his stomach, imagine a long rubber hose connected to patient’s tummy) so off course it was clogged. I threw some coke in there to help unclog it, old nursing trick. Capped it walked away, came back 45 min later when I opened it, he coughed and it shot out right in my face, so everything that was in his stomach and intestines shot up right in my face , my hair, and I just got my eyelashes done, so clumps of crap was hanging from them, I could see them just dangling, the smell was horrendous. Contemplated burning my face off…and I wanted to die.
- One time I had a patient with 3rd and 4th degree burns over 60 % of his body, patient had pseudomonas growing all in his burns. Pseudomonas is a foul smelling bacteria combined with the smell of burnt flesh, by the way actually smells like mesquite and a fresh campfire to me. So long story short he pooped and we had to take the dressing off and we applied some Dakins (basically bleach) dry dressing and flexinet . Flexinet is like fishnet panty hose, so when I stretched it out to cut it off to change dressing because he was covered in poop and pseudomonas , the first cut snapped it back and flung poop..pseudomonas..and yellow sloth (dead infected skin) in my face and hit my lips…I wanted to die..really.. really wanted to die.
- One time I had a trauma patient that shot himself in the mouth bullet traveled from the top of the inside of his mouth traveled up through his left check, popped out the left eye and exit through the top of his head, didn’t die.. so I had to suction his mouth very carefully, because even though he was alive he had brain matter falling from the hole in his mouth, so one time I was suctioning and I caused a cough…and it all shot out so fast hit me in the face …after washing my face a billion times an hour later I scratched my ear and I had a small piece of brain matter in my ear… I wanted to die.
- One time I had a patient that was prisoner in federal custody, the cop watching over him unhooked the right hand so he could pee in a plastic cup , a thing we call a urinal, and when he finished I walked towards him to grab and empty it, he asked me for morphine I told him for the thousand time he couldn’t have any and he got mad, called me a rat taco eating bitch (I’m Mexican) and threw his urine on me and it hit my hair.. chest and face… I could smell his pungent yellow foul smelling urine the rest of my shift no matter how much I scrubbed everything for the rest of the shift… and I wanted to die…
- One time I walked in on my patient that rolled up his poop like a tootsie roll and was eating it.
- One time I had a guy who was in some kind of incident, I forgot why, but he had his butthole surgically closed up and the surgeon made a hole on the side of his stomach, pulled out a piece of his colon cut it, (made a stoma) and that is where he poops , he changes the bag or empties it when it was full of poop, anyways, he and his partner decided to have sex through it, and it got infected with a STD, so I had to give antibiotics, but also had to rub the colon (stoma) with medicine in a gel like form on it, and he said it tickled, because he coughed and I got colon ..green gross stuff, and STD all over my pretty pink scrubs and my neck…ugh.. I wanted to die.